Here is a helpful way to fight sexual sin and lust. If you haven't checked out the audio or video from the Sex and the Supremacy of Christ conference you really should (just click on the title of the conference and you can check it all out for free). David Powlison's talk was really helpful in showing how to get a little more understanding about how these sins work. Here's a quick quote from the book that was written as a result of the conference Sex and the Supremacy of Christ:
"The way Jesus loves is the diametric opposite from how sexual sin works. Whether flagrant or atmospheric, whether physical or imaginary, sexual sin is hate. It misuses people. Jesus' love treasures and serves our sexual purity. We misuse God's gift of sexuality when we do not treasure and serve the sexual purity of others. We degrade ourselves and degrade others. As Jesus starts to rearrange how you treat people, you are becoming a qualitatively different kind of person...
First, you learn to see and treat all people in wise, constructive ways. In principle, for the Christian, every person of the opposite sex fits into one of three categories: either family member, or spouse, or threat. (Every person of the same sex fits into one of two categories: either family member or threat.) "Family member" is the controlling category. In general we are to view and treat people as beloved sisters and brothers, mothers and fathers, daughters and sons, grandmothers and grandfathers. The lines are clear: anything that sexualizes familial relationships is wrong. True affection and fierce protection go hand in hand. The notion of incestuous sexuality is abhorrent before God. In marriage, one sister, Nan, becomes my wife, and I become her husband. All our sexuality belongs rightly and freely to each other. The notion of treacherous sexuality - infidelity - is abhorrent before God. A third group of people falls into the category of threat. Males and females who prove unfamilial in their intentions are threats. Again, the lines are clear: nothing sexualized, so flee seduction, whether in person or in imagination. The notion of an invitation to immoral sexuality is abhorrent before God. Love is radically free to be fiercely faithful."
Powlison, David Making All Things New: Restoring Pure Joy to the Sexually Broken [From Sex and the Supremacy of Christ] (Wheaton: Crossway, 2005), 103.
How do you think about the opposite sex?